A Bray District Court judge ordered joint custody of two children and set regular visits with the parent each child does not live with, after concluding that the parents’ conflict was harming the children and that their relationship as siblings was being neglected.
In a judgment delivered on 8 August 2018, Judge Brian O’Shea said the children, aged 13 and 11, were increasingly estranged from each other. Their parents, who live about 50 metres apart, had failed to make meaningful use of counselling, mediation or agreement, the court said. The parents are referred to in the judgment only as N.W. and D.C.
The court heard allegations, counter-allegations and denials from the parents, and said their testimony did not assist it in deciding what arrangements best served the children. The judge met each child separately in chambers, with the parents’ agreement and in the presence of a neutral adult. The judgment says both children expressed a wish to maintain meaningful relationships with both parents and missed each other’s company. They also described feeling caught between their parents.
The court found that the children were anxious and that their emotional and psychological needs were not being met. It described the harm as mild at that point, but said it was likely to worsen if the situation continued. The judgment also records concerns about the older child’s school organisation and the parents’ failure to encourage the children’s relationships with the other parent.
The orders provide that both parents have joint custody. The older child will live with the respondent, who has primary care and control, and stay with the applicant from Monday at 5pm until Tuesday at 10am or the start of school, and visit on Thursdays from 5pm to 8pm. The younger child will live with the applicant, who has primary care and control, and visit the respondent on Tuesdays and Fridays from 5pm to 8pm, with the older child present.
The judge also directed each parent to take responsibility for school attendance and equipment on days a child is in their care, and to keep a diary explaining any school absence. The orders prohibit disparaging communications about the other parent in either child’s presence or hearing, and bar using the children to carry inappropriate or burdensome messages. Holiday arrangements are to remain unchanged unless both parents agree in writing.
The judge warned that further breaches could lead the court to consider involving the Child and Family Agency to assess whether supervision might be needed. The case was listed for review on 7 November 2018 to monitor compliance and address unforeseen problems, not to rehear the matter.